Thursday, March 17, 2011

I've been being such a burden and pain to most of my friends.
And, My ex. Who's still special to me.
I tried to change my way of thinking, I'm going back to be the old optimistic me again, That Xii everyone missed, Of course, I miss the old me too.
I think It's been great since that.
I feel happier, Not to be too depressed over anything.
To think about today, And only today.
I used to always rely to my love one, My ex.
I'm sorry, And apologize.
I never share enough of my thoughts, And care towards you.
Maybe, I was thinking doing that would only makes you feels annoyed.
I always think over and over again how to act when I'm around you.
Because, Only being with you made me so happy, I wanted you to feel the same.
But I failed. I'm sorry. Haha. But when I heard that you took my advice and moved on.
My heart felt a sting of pain, But happy for you.
Letting you go would be my way of loving you.
Thank  you for taking care of me for this long while.
I'd try to be stronger and stronger.
Until, I could finally stand with my own feet.
Until I could somehow "grown as a person."
I remember your every words and advice.
Cause you're special, And I believe that would never change.
My life, It's almost perfect now, Without you, as a lover, It's sad.
But thinking someone else could made you happy instead of me,
I guess it wasn't such a bad thing. I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY.
I was selfish to force you into a relationship with me,
Again and again. I begged for a relationship that tires you and it still didn't work out.
Thank you for being so kind to me, I appreciates it.
Now, I'll be your friend. Like we promised. I think I'm strong enough to do it this time.

- Song. ( A little bit stronger - Sara Evans. )




Woke up late today and I still feel the sting of the pain
But I brushed my teeth anyway
I got dressed through the mess and put a smile on my face
I got a little bit stronger

Riding in the car to work and I'm trying to ignore the hurt
So I turned on the radio, stupid song made me think of you
I listened to it for minute but I changed it
I'm getting a little bit stronger, just a little bit stronger

And I'm done hoping that we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

Doesn't happen overnight but you turn around
And a month's gone by and you realize you haven't cried
I'm not giving you a hour or a second or another minute longer
I'm busy getting stronger

And I'm done hoping that we can work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking, that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days, I get a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger

Getting along without you, baby
I'm better off without you, baby
How does it feel without me, baby?
I'm getting stronger without you, baby

And I'm done hoping we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

I get a little bit stronger
Just a little bit stronger
A little bit, a little bit, a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger

6:48 AM

femme

I'm Xii / Yuu / Aoi. Working as a clerk in some wood factory, Not quite the type that likes sweets. I've changed a lot in these past few months, I'm just not the same anymore. In thoughts, I think I got a little matured. Well, That's all, I guess.

Loved

Job.
Families & Friends.
Internet.
Sky & Sea.
Music, Drawing..

Wishes.

To open my own cafe someday.
That I could do my job better.
That I could repay my parents somehow.
Get someone who really means to be with me.
To live without a mask on my face everyday.

Hate.

Cockroaches.
Sweets.
Backstabber, Hater, Faker.
Lying, But I still do it.
To be alone..

CBOX?

No, Not now. Maybe later.

Music.

credits

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